Pappa wants mamma naked
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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