just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
