How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
