all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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