How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
