dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
