you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
being pregnant is like rehab
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
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