Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
