Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
