Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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