i barfeds in our rink
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
