i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
