Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake