did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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