Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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