So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I need to stop coming to work sober
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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