I must be too annoying 4 u.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Randomize
