i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize