How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
