that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
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This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
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Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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