She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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