Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
