My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
