Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up

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(502): I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up http://tfl.nu/gsij

Replies (27) Good night (7671) Bad night (864)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"

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(307): So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that" http://tfl.nu/5p37

Replies (8) Good night (1248) Bad night (4547)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.

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(262): He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too. http://tfl.nu/5j5p

Replies (19) Good night (1655) Bad night (3036)
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(614): View more from Ohio

She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?

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(614): She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper? http://tfl.nu/v6av

Replies (13) Good night (1545) Bad night (3635)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night

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(952): Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night http://tfl.nu/i23x

Replies (1) Good night (2094) Bad night (1152)
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(716): View more from New York

I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything

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(716): I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything http://tfl.nu/duov

Replies (4) Good night (1604) Bad night (912)
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(513): View more from Ohio

All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing

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(513): All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing http://tfl.nu/d7sz

Replies (1) Good night (666) Bad night (1242)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT

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(508): I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT http://tfl.nu/r8ka

Replies (21) Good night (7168) Bad night (919)
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(914): View more from New York

Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.

(1-914): View more from New York

You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.

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(914): Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county. (1-914): You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud. http://tfl.nu/15gl

Replies (3) Good night (2173) Bad night (753)
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(951): View more from California

I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.

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(951): I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement. http://tfl.nu/1khp

Replies (2) Good night (1441) Bad night (586)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.

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(847): Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite. http://tfl.nu/nf89

Replies (3) Good night (1086) Bad night (619)
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(655): View more from

Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?

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(655): Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall? http://tfl.nu/cvrt

Replies (12) Good night (1964) Bad night (512)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.

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(570): I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day. http://tfl.nu/mbwl

Replies (2) Good night (957) Bad night (372)
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(216): View more from Ohio

Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.

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(216): Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months. http://tfl.nu/6lkb

Replies (2) Good night (613) Bad night (384)
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(309): View more from Illinois

And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.

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(309): And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left. http://tfl.nu/6io8

Replies (1) Good night (682) Bad night (348)

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