I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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