i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night