I love black thongs
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
