i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
