If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
