The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Even my vagina gasped.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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