Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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