I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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