You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
