ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
