I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
