covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize