you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
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He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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