Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Panties = found
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
