I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Never joke about your clitoris.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
