She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
