Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
