You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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