Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
