i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
i out mim tonsoeep
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