operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
