Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
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