you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
i barfeds in our rink
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
