You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
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