Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
