I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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