i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Are we still banned from the library?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
